Balls — a chrome ball with eyes
Not your ordinary chatbot. Not your everyday search engine. BALLS AI.

BALLS An Agent that ACTUALLY DOES THINGS!!

A full AI agent in your pocket. It books, orders, disputes, researches — and when something needs a human on the phone, it calls, holds forever, and re-dials if they hang up. No humans hear anything. Ever.

Full 14-day trial · Cancel anytime · Failed calls are free
⚡ First 500 lock Balls Deep at $29.99/month — forever · 500 of 500 seats remaining
✓ Failed calls are always free✓ No humans hear your calls✓ Books, orders, disputes, automates
AI that actually does s***.

An agent that does things.

Chatbots type. Search engines answer. Balls does — start to finish, on the phone and off it. The calls are the party trick. The agent is the whole show.

⚡

It does things.

Books. Orders. Disputes. Sends the texts you'd rather not. Summarizes calls so you never relive them. A full agent across the web and your phone — Claude/ChatGPT-class power, made stupid-easy.

📞

It makes the calls.

When something needs a human voice — the dentist, the cable company, the bank — Balls makes the call and handles it start to finish. Not a script. An agent.

🎵

It holds. Forever.

Balls holds for you — always. Hold music, "your call is very important to us" — Balls absorbs all of it. You hang up. It stays on the line.

🔄

It re-dials. Automatically.

Hung up on? Dropped? Balls calls right back, on its own dime. Failed calls are always free — you only pay for calls that work.

And when it's not on the phone? Balls researches, schedules, writes, automates, and gets tasks done across the web. One agent. Every chore. (Illustrative results — your agent, your week.)

The agent economy is here

It's like a Cash App account. For your AI.

You wouldn't hand a teenager your credit card. Same logic applies to an agent that can shop, book, and buy. Balls doesn't need your card — it gets an allowance: your limits, your approved places, your oversight. Instant approval. No accidental charges. You're always in control.

💳

Your limits, not your card.

Set a hard ceiling — "up to $50 a month." Balls spends within the allowance and not a cent past it. It's a digital leash: if it hits the limit, it stops. No "oops, I bought 400 GPUs" nonsense.

🏪

Approved places only.

Restrict Balls to a vendor allowlist — the places you approve. If it's not on the list, the card declines. Think of it as a bouncer that hates unauthorized purchases as much as you do.

🔒

See everything. Freeze anything.

Real-time alerts on every move, and a one-tap kill switch if you ever feel uneasy. Instant approval, zero accidental charges. The regulators call it Know Your Agent — Balls was built to that shape.

🏦

It gets paid too.

Like a teen picking up neighborhood gigs, Balls can earn — its services are sellable to other AI agents on the new payment rails. The first assistant that's a payee: your agent works for you and for itself.

A teen account for your AI: it can spend, it can earn, and you can always see exactly what it did. Agent payments are the rails of 2026 — Visa inside ChatGPT, agent cards, machine-to-machine money. Balls is the first phone agent built on them.

A week with Balls

Things it actually did.

Not a demo. Not a promise. A log of a week — every item done by the agent, start to finish.

Mon 9:02Booked the dentist — Thursday 2:30. (held 11 min)
Mon 11:40Disputed the $47.99 charge. Refunded.
Tue 8:15Answered the pharmacy — "ready for pickup."
Wed 16:22Held 38 min with the cable company. Got the $20 credit.
Thu 9:00Researched HVAC companies, compared quotes, scheduled the visit.
Fri 12:30Ordered your usual. Confirmed.

Illustrative example — every task is something Balls does, start to finish, on your behalf.

Privacy

No humans hear your calls.

Ever. Not us. Not contractors. Not "quality assurance." No humans listen. That's the deal, and it never changes.

Entity substitution

Your real names and numbers never exist outside your phone. When Balls talks to the outside world, it uses stand-ins. Your identity stays home.

On-device by default

The local model runs on your phone — zero data egress on local chat.

No-logging contract

Your call history lives on your device, not on our servers.

Locked-down transport

TLS 1.3 with certificate pinning on everything that leaves your phone.

Full phone control — on your terms.

Balls can send messages, summarize calls, and act across your phone. It has that power only because you gave it — and only until you take it back.

Opt-in. Off by default.

Calls, messages, permissions — each one is turned on by you, one at a time, and nothing happens before you say so.

Every action visible.

Every call, message, and task lands in an activity feed on your device. You see what it did, when, and how it went — always.

One tap to revoke.

Full access back in your hands anytime. No lock-in, no fuss, no begging. Your phone, your rules.

Balls ships with on-device processing, entity substitution, a no-logging contract, and TLS 1.3 transport. We don't sell magic — we sell policy.

Pricing

Calls, not minutes.

Start Free Balling for chat. Add Rising for smarts. Drop in for 10 calls. Go Deep for unlimited. One ladder, four steps — upgrade anytime, pay only for what you need.

💬 Chat only→📞 10 calls/mo→♾️ Unlimited calls
The Insider

Be one of the first 500 to have Balls in your pocket.

$29.99/month, for life
Founder-500: unlimited calls*, locked forever. When the seats are gone, Balls Deep is $49.99 — and the price never comes back. · 500 of 500 seats remaining

Be a founder. Have some balls.

Claim My Seat — $29.99 Forever
The Hook
Free Balling
$0/forever
  • AI chat on your phone
  • Private by default — local-first, optional cloud taste
  • No calls — yet
Go Freeballing
The Brain
Balls Rising
$9.99/mo
  • The full agent: research, tasks, automation
  • Cloud-powered smarts
  • Chat only — no calls
Go Rising
The Starter Calls
The Drop
$29/mo
  • The full agent — bigger quota
  • 10 calls a month
  • Failed calls are always free
One dollar more buys forever — first 500 only. Have some balls.
Take The Drop

The ladder: Free Balling → Balls Rising → The Drop → Balls Deep. Upgrade anytime — pay only for what you need.
Annual: $499/year — 2 months free. · Extra seat: +$19.99/mo. · Trial: 14-day full trial, cancel anytime.
Fine print: The Drop is $0.20/min after your 10 calls, capped at $40/month. Balls Deep is flat-rate — no overage, ever.

* Unlimited calls means unlimited for real people, subject to our Fair Use Policy: hold time truly unlimited, a generous monthly allowance invisible to 99%+ of users, and a discretionary proportionality clause for the 0.01% who abuse it.

The 99-cent gap

Ten calls. Or every call. A dollar apart.

Claim $29.99 Forever
The comparison

Pay a human. Or pay a ball.

You know what a secretary costs. Here's the difference.

What you'd payTypical priceWhat you get
AI receptionist — starter$49/mo~250 minutes, then overage
AI receptionist — business$79/moCapped minutes
AI receptionist — premium$149/mo~1,000 minutes
Human phone concierge$300+/moA human, business hours
Full-time human secretary~$4,000/moA human, full time, hears everything
Balls Deep$49.99/moEvery call. Holds forever. The whole agent.

Typical 2026 market rates. Same ballpark as the starter AI receptionist — for every call, forever, plus the whole agent. We're not the cheap option. We're the only option that isn't a timer.

FAQ

Questions. Answered. (No hold music.)

Is "unlimited" really unlimited?

Yes — with one asterisk and a policy to back it. Unlimited calls means a generous monthly fair-use allowance (calibrated to be invisible to 99%+ of real users) and hold time that is truly unlimited with no cap. There's a discretionary clause for the tiny fraction of users who abuse the system. For everyone else: unlimited means unlimited. Fair Use Policy.

Does anyone listen to my calls?

No. No humans hear your calls. Ever. Not us, not contractors, not anyone. Your real names and numbers never exist outside your phone — Balls uses entity substitution when it talks to the outside world — and local chat runs fully on-device with zero data egress.

What happens if a call fails?

You pay nothing. Failed calls are always free — hung up on, dropped, wrong number, line dead. Balls re-dials automatically on its own dime. You only pay for calls that actually work.

Will Balls really wait on hold for me?

Yes. Forever. That's the whole trick. Balls absorbs the hold music so you don't have to. On The Drop, hold time counts half toward your monthly calls; on Balls Deep, hold is unlimited on top of unlimited.

How does the 14-day trial work?

Full access to any paid plan for 14 days, including unlimited calls on Balls Deep. No card surprises — full trial, every feature, then you decide. Cancel in one tap.

Can I cancel anytime?

Yes. One tap in the app, no phone call (ironic, we know), no retention scripts. Keep Free Balling at $0 forever if you like.

What is Founder-500?

The first 500 customers lock Balls Deep at $29.99/month for life. After those seats are gone, Balls Deep is $49.99. The price grows up; your locked price doesn't.

Why is the $29 plan called "The Drop"?

Because your balls dropped, and now you go Deep. It's also the decoy plan — 10 calls for $29, when one dollar more buys every call forever. It exists to be destroyed.

What can Balls do besides calls?

Everything a full AI agent does: research, web tasks, automation, scheduling, writing, tool use. The phone is the headline; the brain is the whole paper.

How does Balls pay for things?

Like a teen account, but for AI. You set a monthly allowance and approved places; Balls spends within the cap, never with your card number, and logs every cent. You can freeze or revoke anytime. And it can earn too — other agents can pay Balls for phone tasks, research, and booking on the new agent-payment rails. It's a Cash App account for your AI.

Why should I trust an AI with money?

Think of your agent like a teenager with a debit card. You wouldn't hand them your life savings — you give them a controlled allowance. Hard spend caps, a vendor allowlist (it literally cannot swipe at the wrong store), real-time alerts on every move, and a one-tap kill switch. You get the help without risking the bank.

What phone do I need?

Balls is an Android app and runs on any modern Android phone. Install, grant call access, and you're live in minutes.

Is my data used to train anything?

No. No-logging contract: your calls and chats aren't logged to our servers, your history stays on your device, and local chat never leaves your phone at all.

What's a monthly spend ceiling?

A hard cap so a wild month never hurts: $40/month on The Drop — the only plan with per-minute overage. Balls Deep is flat-rate unlimited: no overage, nothing to cap, one price.

What happens after my 10 calls on The Drop?

You pay $0.20/min for extra calls until your ceiling — or you upgrade to Balls Deep and never count a call again. We know which one you'll pick.

Can I add my family or team?

Yes. Extra seats are +$19.99/month each, and annual billing is $499/year — two months free.

What if I just want to chat, not call?

Free Balling is $0 forever — on-device chat with a daily cloud taste, local-first and private. The phone is optional. The balls are not.

Your calls aren't going to make themselves.

Every appointment, every dispute, every 45-minute hold — it's all just waiting for someone with enough balls to delegate it. That someone is you. The someone doing it is Balls.

Start Free Trial — 14 Days
14-day full trial · Cancel anytime · Failed calls are free